HONORING A BEAUTIFUL LIFE

It took my sister and her husband over 3 years to conceive Diego. I can still remember the day they announced their second pregnancy. We were all so anxious to meet Diego. We had planned an intimate baby shower for my sister to be had on February 3rd, 2007. We were all getting ready for his arrival. My sister was 8 months pregnant. Then, on February 2nd, I got an early morning call my from eldest sister letting me know that Erika had gone to the hospital because she hadn't felt Diego move in a few hours. I specifically remember my heart starting to pound really fast and really loud but I felt in my heart that everything was fine so I still went to work knowing that I'd get the good news that Diego was soon on his way. Besides, my sister Emma was going to be there with her and Erika's husband, Hector.

It was about 8:30am when I got the 2nd call from my sister. I answered and I remember her getting choked up. I asked if everything was okay and she responded with the words, "there is no baby Diego." I didn't understand what she meant at first. She told me that the doctor was unable to find Diego's heartbeat. They gave her the choice of getting induced that day or carrying him until full term. She decided to get induced.

I remember crying at work and telling my co-workers that my sister had just lost her baby. I remember leaving the office and driving to my parents house in an absolute daze. When I arrived, I found my mom and my sister Emma sitting in the kitchen and we all started crying together. I drove my mom and I to the hospital right away. When we arrived to the Labor and Delivery area, I asked the nurse behind the counter where I could find Erika. She then proceeded to ask me," has she given birth yet?" I didn't know how to answer that. I started crying and answered that my sister had just lost her baby. She apologized and showed us the way. I can still clearly remember walking into the hospital room and finding my sister and brother-in-law in there. I hugged my sister tight and told her how sorry I was. The rest of the day went by in such a flash. When it was time for my sister to deliver Diego, I took my mom to another room, knowing that we wouldn't be able to stand being in that room seeing my sister in such pain. It was short delivery. When we walked back in, I remember my sister holding Diego in her arms, crying such tears of pain. We all held him and when it was my turn, I remember kissing his cheek and telling him that I loved him. He was so tiny and so perfect. When it was time for the nurse to take him away, I remember crying with so much disbelief and so much agony. That was one of the hardest days of my life...for all of us.

Diego will forever and always be a part of our lives and we will never, ever forget him. He brought us so much happiness in the short amount of time that he was with us (in my sister's belly). I truly believe that he sent us his brother Adam, hoping that he would bring joy back into our lives.

I never knew about stillbirth until Diego. Erika and Hector wanted to do something to honor him in a special way so we all participated in the March of Dimes walk last year. This year, we're doing it again for him. It falls on my husband's birthday and we can't think of a better way to start the day. This year, Erika and Hector made a smaller goal for themselves. If you'd like to help them reach that goal, you can make a tax-deductible donation on their page. Any amount of money will make a difference for this great cause. I thank you in advance for helping us honor his life.

We love you and miss you so much Diego.

WEEKEND UPDATE

I had a great weekend, yet it was a bittersweet one.

Friday

My husband and I carpooled to work so after he picked me up, since I had a LONG week, we went to a Thai restaurant to have one of our favorite meals...chicken with red wine sauce. YUM! We used to have this a lot when we were dating but hadn't had it in years! It was just as delicious as I remembered it. We even had leftovers and had those for lunch the next day!

Saturday

This was a very special day. It marked one year since my nephew earned his angel wings at 36 weeks....his 1st birthday. It was a beautiful memorial and I know Diego was looking down on us smiling. It was an intimate gathering, held at his gravesite. My sister had asked my husband to play "Tears in Heaven" on his guitar. After that, my sister read a beautiful letter to her son that moved us all to tears. Then we had a balloon release for him. As we let the balloons go up into Heaven for Diego, "Someday we'll be together" was playing in the background. It was perfect. We had cupcakes in his honor and then joined my sister and her husband back at their place for an early dinner. It really was a beautiful memorial. Happy Birthday baby boy. We miss you and we love you more each day.

Sunday

This family has been close family friends with my husband's family since they were kids. They have always been a warm, loving family. The youngest of the kids, Mariclaire and her husband Paul, have a baby boy named Preston Chase. Last year, they received the devastating news that Preston has a very rare genetic disorder called Sandhoff disease. Last week, little Preston suffered his first seizure, one of the symptoms of this disorder. Luckily, he made it back home in time to celebrate his 2nd birthday surrounded by those that love him. We were honored to be invited to celebrate with Preston. I had not seen him in quite a while. When I saw Preston yesterday, he was sitting in his wheelchair, with his little eyes drooping from exhaustion and staring up into the ceiling. It broke my heart. Children with Sandhoff normally don't live past 3 years of age but I hope in my heart that Preston is the exception. His mother and father are SO strong. Please say a little prayer for Preston.

Happy Belated Birthday also to my best friend Coral! Her birthday was yesterday and we spoke but I still wanted to give her a little blog love. Love you Coral!

THANKSGIVING WISH

2007 has been a year full of trials and tribulations. The most difficult months for us were February, when my sister gave birth to my angel nephew and April, when my brother-in-law was diagnosed with a brain tumor. They were both gut-wrenching moments that I think about constantly. I think about the moment when I walked into the hospital room where was sister was closely holding her lifeless baby. I think about holding him for a brief minute. I think about the last time I saw him at the mortuary. I think about seeing Henry lying in his hospital bed with bandages on his head after his brain surgery. I think about the day the doctor told us how long he possibly had. It feels like yesterday. They are moments that defined what this year has been like for us. During those months, I felt such agony and I truly felt that I was never going to feel happiness again. Yes, throughout these hardships, it has made all of us stronger and I’d like to think that it only brought all of us closer together as a family. Yes, we were always thankful that we were all together on Thanksgiving Day but at the same time, I believe we may have taken it for granted. Although it’s been a year full of trials and tribulations, we still have a lot to be thankful for. I am thankful that my sister is expecting again. I’m thankful that Henry is doing so well and is back to himself again before this nightmare began. I am thankful that I have both of my parents in my life and they are both healthy. I am thankful that I am surrounded by friends that I love and have shown me how much they love me this year. I am thankful that on this Thanksgiving holiday, I will have my entire family with me around the dinner table with one special angel watching over all of us. I wish all of you a wonderful Thanksgiving surrounded by the people you love.

AND I'M OFF!!!

It's FINALLY Friday!!!!! Thank the Lord!!! Granted I still have another 3 1/2 hours to get through but that's much better than 3 1/2 days! I cannot wait. Maui, here we come! I hate to admit it but it will be hard (well, maybe not that hard) trying not to think about all the e-mails accumulating in my inbox at work while I'm gone for a whole week but I have to keep telling myself that the work will still be there when I'm back. I tried not to leave anything BIG pending but of course there are things I was waiting on that I never got in time...especially from my East Coast buyers. So work will be on my mind...but only for a short time I'm sure. :) I plan to thoroughly enjoy this vacation.

I'm also looking forward to tomorrow. We'll be waking up bright and early to participate in the Angel Adventure Walk. My sister got tee-shirts made and it should be an inspiring event I hope. We did the same thing earlier this year in honor of my nephew and it was a wonderful experience. Then later in the afternoon, we're celebrating Henry's birthday with friends and family. Should make for a great weekend.

I will post once I'm back. I won't lie...I won't exactly be rushing to blog while I'm in Hawaii so let it be said that I will update everyone on my trip once I'm back...and not on "vacation mode" anymore. Have a great weekend and week everyone and ALOHA!

BIRTHDAYS GALORE AND RANDOM THOUGHTS

Dearest Blog Readers,

Sorry I've been MIA. I was stuck in sales meetings ALL day yesterday and I barely had a chance to take a deep breath. Whew! But it's over for now and not only that...it's Friday! Although I'm relieved that it's Friday, it's probably the only Friday I've been dreading for a while now. You see, in the 8 years that I've known my husband, he has been trying to get me to go to Knott's Halloween Haunt. I can't say I've never given it a chance though. I actually went a couple times when I was in high school but I made a personal vow to myself that I just WOULD NOT go back. Yes, I'm a chicken. I'm a 29-year old chicken who gets genuinely frightened at these things. I've tried telling myself that it's a person in there just dressed up in a silly costume and that it's all makeup...but I just can't help it! I HATE the feeling of being scared! So why did I agree to go? Because a pretty large group of us is going and they all promised to let little 'ole me be in between 2 people AT. ALL. TIMES. So fellow bloggers, I ask that you please think good thoughts for me tonight. Wish me luck in surviving this stupid thing. Oh lord help me.

On a happier note, Happy 14th Birthday to my niece Bianca! It was actually yesterday but since I didn't get a chance to post, I'm giving her a shout out now. Tomorrow night is my mom's birthday and we'll be celebrating it with our family at a restaurant. Should be fun. Then on the 18th is Henry's birthday which we're all looking forward to. We'll be celebrating his on the 20th, the day before we leave for Hawaii.

I started Weight Watchers on Monday. No, I didn't actually sign up for it since I'm trying to save myself the money but I have been following the program since I have everything I need. It's only been 4 days and I swear I feel as though my clothes are fitting slighly better...but it might just be in my head. :) I'll take whatever I can get!

On another note, we all went through a horrible tradegy earlier this year when my sister and her husband lost my nephew. We got a ray of light after that occurred when my sister announced they were pregnant again! We're all so happy and excited for them. A little bit of bad news is that they think my sister has gestational diabetes...which she had when she was pregnant with Diego. I know this is common in a lot of pregnancies but you can't help but wonder if this is what caused Diego to go up to Heaven. Today my sister is taking the 3 hour glucose exam and whether she has GD or not, we're all praying for a happy ending. Please, please pray that my sister, her husband and my nephew welcome a healthy baby this December. I had a dream last night that my sister came home with a baby boy in her arms. I'd like to think that it's God's way of letting me know that everything is going to be okay.

Have a great weekend everyone!

MINI VACATION AND BLOG PARTY

I'm back! Morongo was a nice 2-day getaway.


Thursday


We (well, more like I) slept until our hearts content this morning. Since we had no flight to catch or no appointments to be at, we took our time and started the day off at our own pace. That was a great way to start off. So instead of leaving at 10 or 11am at the latest like we had planned, we were finally on the road at 12:30. The drive was short...an hour and a half to be exact. The next thing we knew, we had arrived to our first destination...the Desert Hills outlets. Crate & Barrel, Gucci, Juicy Couture, True Religion...oh my! A true abundance of premium labels. And we walked out with...nothing. That's right...only spent less than $5 on the smoothie I was craving while we were there. I don't know if I have house-buying on my mind or I knew we'd need money on our Maui trip coming up in a couple of weeks but I didn't buy a single thing. I was definitely tempted when I laid my eyes upon some boots at Aldo, but alas, I refrained.

Once we left the outlets, we drove to our hotel and checked into our room. I opted for the standard room and was pleasantly surprised at how contemporary the decor was and how spacious the room was.

Our view:

That night, we dined at Desert Orchid. I didn't have much of an appetite since we had each had a slice of pizza earlier in the day so I barely touched my dinner but it was good nonetheless. He had sushi for dinner. Despite how slow it was that night, we had a bit of a wait for our edamame appetizer but the service was good so it made up for the wait.

After dinner, we had a drink at the Pit Bar (yep, that's right, the Pit Bar) and called it a night.

Friday

We woke up fairly early to get ready for our massages at the Sage Spa. Definitely one of the best parts of the trip. I always enjoy a massage and this one was no exception.

After our massages, we ate lunch at the buffet. In order to get $5 off each (did I mention we are on a budget?!?), we joined the Winners Club. It was free and it took less than 2 minutes to sign us up. I got a big no-no when someone saw the flash from this shot I took...I played dumb and pretended I didn't know I wasn't supposed to take pictures inside the casino).

The buffet turned out to be okay...but the best part was the bread pudding and apple crisp I had for dessert...two of my favorite things! :) After lunch, we played a little air hockey in the arcade and kicked some butt together at Pac-Man! Good times...

Our plans were changed when we found out that the pool was closed for the day since the weather wasn't cooperating (it was a bit cloudy and windy) so since we had planned on spending the day at the pool, we went back to our room and took a nap...which made Jolene very happy! :)

After our nap, we got ready for dinner. We were going to go to Cielo but once we saw the menu prices, we decided to go to Serrano . I had the pasta and it was delish!

After dinner, we went to 360 Lounge. It was a very cool little bar with great decor but after realizing that it was close to 11pm and the crowd just hadn't picked up (we were literally the 2nd couple to arrive and the crowd didn't get much bigger after that), we left. We did manage to take a few pictures though:

After 360, we headed to Vibe. The crowd was definitely a little bigger there and we even managed to dance a few songs but mainly, we had a great time people watching. There were definitely some dancers there to put on a show...we were laughing it up! After a couple hours there, we called it a night.

Saturday

The next morning we woke up, got ready and checked out. We ate lunch at the buffet one last time. I decided to indulge once again in the bread pudding and the apple crisp, although there were plenty of other desserts to choose from.

After lunch, we gassed up and we were on our way back home. We had a great time.

After we got home, we left our luggage and headed to the cemetary. I had been working on a very special Halloween project for my nephew's little gravesite. I was happy with the results since I don't exactly call myself the "craft queen." I'm hoping it's the first of many special signs I make for him. :)

Sunday

Sunday morning, I met up with some fabulous ladies at 26 Beach in Venice. I have gotten addicted to reading blogs and had the opportunity to meet some fellow bloggers! We all had a great time and I hope to do it again soon. I had the "Go Bananas" french toast and it was to die for. I ate every bite. Well, maybe not every bite since I didn't want to look like the slob :).

*You can look at Weezermonkey's blog for a great recap*

Here we are again...another Monday. Counting the days until our Maui vacation...